the deep blue...

Sometimes I wonder if I make a difference in this world. Sometimes I worry that I don't or that when I do it is a negative difference. I live my life and I am myself and I don't care what others think (or maybe I do and don't tell myself that). Sometimes I think that my personality turns people away and I don't know. But I worry sometimes.

Then something happens... For example... In my indi rock band we got a new keyboard player and I have only seen her twice the whole time. The first day that I met her was the day before finals week started and I was out of school on May 19th. I know some of you hate me for that. Anyways, I talked to her awhile about life in general and what I want to do with my life. (For those of you who don't know I want to be a missionary). Then I saw her for the second time and it was last Sunday almost a week ago and a month after the first time I met her. She walks into the practice room and looks at me and the first thing out of her mouth is, "I just wanted you to know that ever since I met you God has put a desire in my heart to be a missionary. That is all I think about. Just so you know you are making a difference." I was kinda shocked.

Another example... There is a lady at my work (I think that I have talked about her before) and this past week at work she told me about a problem that she and her husband are having. They are trying to decide whether to take in there sister and her three kids. She explained it too me and how she felt and I told her that if what she was feeling was what I thought she was feeling that it was probably God. I gave her the verse Matthew 25:34-40 which says...

"Then the King will say to those on His right, 'Come, you who are blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. 'For I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me.' "Then the righteous will answer Him, 'Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink? 'And when did we see You a stranger, and invite You in, or naked, and clothe You? 'When did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?'" The King will answer and say to them, 'Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.'...

Then two nights ago we were talking and she told me that they were going to take them in. I just smiled. She asked what verse I had given her and then she told me that she was talking to her mom and that every time she was at her lowest I was there. That she would be alone at work somewhere and I would show up and talk to her. She thought that was weird in a good sort of way. Ernest was kinda shocked about that.

That will be all for now. Later days...
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